Monday, February 18, 2013

Farewell, to two little boys...

Singing. From their very first day, we sing to our kids. Soothing lullabies to calm a restless baby (or agitated mums and dads). As our babies grow into toddlers, soothing songs remain part of the bedtime ritual.

But it's just hit home to me that the singing ends.

The Complicated One no longer wants me to sing to him at night. The Big Fella still lets me occasionally, but even he's starting to move on.

It seems to happen around 5 or 6 years, but at some point your kids just don't want you singing anymore. Perhaps they think it's only for babies, or it's not cool. They don't say, and I don't ask.

Now that both our boys are at school, change seems to be speeding up. Maturity, exposure to a wider group of friends drawn from more diverse backgrounds, or just the acceleration of peer pressure, which will only intensify as they rocket towards and into the teen years.

So before I forget, I want to write down the names of the songs we sang to our boys.

Admittedly, it's a wonky collection of tunes, sung with a wonky voice, but I don't care! It's my 6-song repertoire of suitable bedtime songs where I know all the words:
  1. Morningtown Ride by The Seekers 
  2. Puff the Magic Dragon, by Peter Paul and Mary 
  3. Two Little Boys by Rolf Harris 
  4. Thankyou for the Music by Abba 
  5. Dancing Queen by Abba
  6. Looking for an Echo by Ole'55 (or better still, by Kenny Vance and the Planetones).
Some of them are songs my mum sang to me, like The Seekers' Morningtown Ride...
"Train whistle blowing, makes a sleepy noise,
Underneath the blankets, go all the girls and boys..."
If there's a pop song in the last 40 years with better lyrics or a sleepier melody for little kids, I'd like to know.

Perhaps, I hear you suggest, another folk song from the 1960s? Like Peter, Paul and Mary's Puff the Magic Dragon. It's another great bedtime song, but for years we didn't sing the next to last verse, because it's too sad...
"Dragons live forever, but not so little boys
Painted wings and giant rings make way for other toys..."
Two Little Boys by Rolf Harris is another bedtime favourite with a happy/sad final verse that we edited out for years. But sometimes, they'd ask for it, for their own private reasons...
"Long years had passed, war came so fast,
Bravely they marched away.
Cannon roared loud, and in the mad crowd,
Wounded and dying lay..."
Like a good showman I like to leave 'em dancing, and nothing fills me with more joy than Abba. The Complicated One always enjoyed Thankyou for the Music, which sounds OK even with my two-note singing. It perfectly captures the balance between light and dark in Abba's music.

An alternative show-stopper is Dancing Queen. "Friday night and the lights are low, looking out for the place to go..." is a familiar and much-loved refrain for my generation.

But my sneaky favourite is Looking for an Echo, as sung by Ole'55 on Countdown in 1976, to me as an impressionable pre-teen... 
"At daydream junior high school we used to harmonise,
Me and Frankie and Jimmy and some Italian guy.
We were singing oldies but they were newies then,
And today when I play my old 45s I remember when..."
Now that I am an old music nerd, I've tracked down the original version first performed by Kenny Vance in 1975 - and it's even better!

Kenny Vance first knew fame in the 1960s with Jay and the Americans (their big hit, This Magic Moment, features in a current TV commercial for a certain gambling company). Vance turns 70 this year, still performs regularly in New York and New Jersey, and still sings this beautifully as a finale to his shows... Looking for an Echo - Kenny Vance and the Planetones.

Looking for an Echo best sums up the beauty and melancholy I feel as I sing to our boys. Knowing they can't stay little forever, but not wanting to let go to some of the special times that may never come again...
"We've sung a lot of changes since 1955
And a lot of bad arrangements we've tried to harmonize.
Now we've turned into oldies, but we were newies then,
And today when I play my old 45's, I remember when...
We were looking for an echo, an answer to our sound.
A place to be in harmony,
A place we almost found."

Monday, February 4, 2013

First day of school - what a difference a year makes!

The Big Fella went to school today without a backward look. He waved happily to us, and literally skipped into the classroom.

What a contrast to The Complicated One's first day of school, when he retired to bed in his school uniform just before we left the house, and literally had to be dragged crying into the classroom on days 1 and 2.

They're different cats, that's for sure. The Big Fella is sure of himself, and goes with the flow. He'll talk to anyone, and nothing much bothers him.

The Complicated One is less sure of himself, thinks of all the alternatives, worries about which is the right choice, and second guesses himself afterwards. He'll only talk to you if he likes you, and pretty much everything bothers him (I guess I'm exaggerating a bit!).

The Big Fella has a good friend from his child care centre starting kindy at the same time. They're not in the same class, but having a familiar face in the playground on day 1 must make a huge difference.

Plus he's been to the school every day for a year, dropping off or picking up his brother, so it's already a familiar place. Add a different personality, and you can see why The Big Fella is recipe for success.

We suspect it won't all be smooth sailing. He's amongst the youngest in his class. And writing and craft type activities don't yet appear to be his forte. He's more of a running around kicking a soccer ball kinda guy.

In a few weeks he may well decide school is boring, and declare he's had enough. He's done that sort of thing before.

But just as likely he'll find some way to make school fun and interesting, perhaps by focussing on activities outside the classroom.

Who knows what hidden talents school will reveal? It may be oral presentations (try shutting him up!). It may be acting (he's already a clown). It may even be numbers (he's certainly more interested in adding up that recognising letters).

Whatever happens, The Big Fella and The Complicated One will make an interesting pair as they travel through their school years together.

Sometimes I imagine it will be like the Reacher brothers from the Lee Child novels. Jack, the novels' hero, is the younger but physically bigger and tougher brother of the more thoughtful Joe.

Jack used to beat up the kids who gave Joe trouble in school. Jack says "... we had different brains. Deep down, he was a cerebral guy. Kind of pure. Naive, even. He never thought dirty. Everything was a game of chess with him.”

Not that The Big Fella has ever swung a punch. He's not yet even 5 years old - and quite gentle, for a big unit. But maybe he'll be looking out for his big brother, and vice versa.

Let's hope he's as cool and relaxed on the last day of school, as his first.